Describes scientific amusements at the New CutNew Cut, street CloseView the register entry >>, London. These include the 'microscopic exhibition' where, for a halfpenny, one can see 'insects in a drop of water, myriads of which are swallowed, upon the authority of the showmen, every time we drink'. Other attractions include astronomical observations, which cost halfpenny or 'whatever you chance to have in your pockets' at the time.
Explains that since light is 'from its name, without weight' it 'travels with a velocity which renders it uncommonly warm when it reaches us'. Suggests various amusing experiments to test dispersion, refraction and other properties of light. For example, to prove dispersion it suggests punching somebody in the eye and noting that 'a curious dispersion of light immediately ensues, showing various lights of startling brilliancy, and leaving a ring of prismatic colours round' the eye. Warns that pencils of light 'must not be confounded with lead pencils', which produce 'shade', and that although reflection 'is best explained by reference to a glass [...] two or more glasses tend to diminish reflection'.
Definitions of mechanics, matter, and 'forces applied to a point' draw on examples taken from the world of legal practice, politics, and journalism, and exploit other non-scientific meanings of terms, such as motion, cause, and matter. Mechanics, for example, is defined as 'the science that treats of the motion of bodies; and a briefless barrister, being somebody without a motion', does not 'come under the law alluded to'. Defines matter as 'for the most part, material; but there is some matter, like that of Jenkins, in the Morning PostMorning Post and Daily Advertising Pamphlet
(1772–1900+)
Waterloo Directory
CloseView the register entry >>, which though containing length and thickness, is quite immaterial'. (The reference is to Punch's spoof Morning Post journalist, Peter Jenkins, who personified the paper's sycophancy; see Altick 1997Altick, Richard D. 1997. Punch: The Lively Youth of a
British Institution 1841–1851, Colombus: Ohio State University
Press
CloseView the register entry >>, 77–78.) To illustrate the equilibrium of a body acted on by two equal and opposite forces it claims that if 'anybody is being sued for debts on one side, he has only to get himself sued on all sides for debts of equal amount, in order to set himself at rest'.
Describes the work of Professor Porsoff, a member of the 'Twaddle-and-Squat' Society, who has spent six months amassing statistics on walking-sticks and their possessors passing a spot in London Bridge.
Links the earthquake to the contact of a lighted cigar with sewer gases. Notes that the explosion forced the removal of the sewer's iron grating which in turn prompted a 'select Committee' of the City of London Commissioners of SewersCity of London Commissioners of Sewers
CloseView the register entry >> to 'sit upon it'. Adds that a member of the Geological SocietyGeological Society of London
CloseView the register entry >> has examined the 'ruins on a lamp post' on the spot, though his efforts have been frustrated by the gas company.
Announces feats of transportation, including the sending of a gentleman 'at one of the West End Clubs' to Coventry in 'less than five minutes'. Notes that the statesman Joseph HumeHume, Joseph
(1777–1855)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> has been appointed chairman of a company to investigate the use of screws on ships 'from his intimate knowledge of putting on the screw generally'.
Reports that this company has been asking Joseph HumeHume, Joseph
(1777–1855)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> for assistance, knowing Hume's experience of 'building castles in the air', but warns that Hume cannot be trusted in this regard, since 'his undertakings having invariably fallen to the ground'.
Describes the setting and entrance fee to the Royal Polytechnic InstitutionRoyal Polytechnic Institution
CloseView the register entry >>, a building 'founded for the exhibition of objects of art among its curiosities and occasional objects of nature amongst its visitors'. Notes that the 'Hall of Manufactures' contains 'a whirlwind of machinery in full action' and discusses the analysis of the water contained in a tank used to display model ships by the professor of chemistry (an allusion to John RyanRyan, John
(1810–1876)
WBI CloseView the register entry >>). Discusses the 'Diving Bell', which the institution's guide-book claims is raised and lowered by a 'crab', and the 'wringing-machine', which is regarded as a promising way of removing the society's 'wet blankets'. Notes that on the Institution's roof, visitors are 'regaled' with microscopes, dissolving views, and electrical machines. Each 'exhibition' contains a 'joke': for example, the 'display of various animated tadpoles of restless habits, who perform an intricate quadrille amidst the cheers of the spectators'. Concludes that at the end of the demonstration 'the lecturer becomes nearly as exhausted as the receivers of his own air-pump'.
Believes the 'sinking' British Association for the Advancement of ScienceBritish Association for the Advancement of Science
CloseView the register entry >> 'shows its tact in trying to hold on at Cork' and adds that it should explore a cave near Cork which is alleged to have no end. Notes papers by Professor Wollops on the 'eccentric motion of the common jack-towel round the ordinary roller' and Professor Spooney's paper on 'The Phenomena of Fixed Weather-Cocks'.
Brief descriptions of the alleged activities of the British Association for the Advancement of ScienceBritish Association for the Advancement of Science
CloseView the register entry >>. These include Professor Luddyfuddy on 'the probable length of the whiskers of the Aborigines of Ancient Jericho' and the association's 'experiments with the ordinary knife and fork'.
Notes the rising interest in London's water prompted by Theobald Mathew'sMathew, Theobald ('Father')
(1790–1856)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> mission and Dr Granville'sGranville, Dr
(fl. 1843)
PU1/5/10/2 CloseView the register entry >> work on German spa towns. A boy operating the pump for the 'Mineral Springs' at 'St. Chad's Wells' claimed that the water from the pump was 'good for everything' but the reporter argues that 'as nothing is usually the matter with those who drink it, it is equally good for nothing'. A 'treatise' on the springs boasts that they 'approach nearer to that universal remedy, so much sought after by mankind in all ages'. One of the illustrations shows bottles of St Chad's water dancing about.
Announces awards to personalities of the day for undertaking their dubious activities. For example, 'Davy Doddle' was awarded 2s. 6d. for his 'continuing observations at Charing Cross on the ordinary omnibuses, and for applying to them the principles of perpetual motion, by means of the ordinary time keeper', while Alfred BunnBunn, Alfred
(1796–1860)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> was awarded 5s. 'for unfixing some of the fixed stars [actors], and causing them to come down very considerably', and Robert KaneKane, Sir Robert John
(1809–1890)
DSB CloseView the register entry >> was awarded 1s. 'for some experiments in tanning, as applicable to the human hide'.
Hospitals, Class, Medical Treatment, Human Species, Politics
Examines the objects of a hospital 'to be founded on foolscap'. Reveals that the building is to be constructed so that 'no patient should see what is going on about him'. Adds that on the completion of the building, the statesman Henry P Brougham (1st Baron Brougham and Vaux)Brougham, Henry Peter, 1st Baron Brougham and
Vaux
(1778–1868)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> will be removed into 'Vanity Ward', where he will be prevented from writing and nobody will be able to listen to him. Notes the large number of patients expected at the 'Selfishness Ward' and the construction of the 'Idleness Ward—Arrogance Ward—Bribery and Corruption Ward', the wards being 'peculiarly adapted to the diseases of the aristocracy'.
Electricity, Display, Railways, Lecturing, Popularization, Steam-power, Military Technology, War, Chemistry, Photography
Describes Mr Punch's investigation of the hydroelectric machine at the Royal Polytechnic InstitutionRoyal Polytechnic Institution
CloseView the register entry >>. Likening the machine to a 'maimed locomotive upon wooden legs', Punch explores its powers of responding, by electricity, positively and negatively to questions put to it via 'metal notes'. The 'lecturer' then explained 'the theory of steam electricity' and when the steam was let off to produce electricity, it rapidly melted the tin, which mitigated against the machine's 'pecuniary success'. It also produced a 'series of bright reports' which suggests to Mr Punch that the Polytechnic would be powerful enough to prevent an invasion by such foes as Caesar, with the 'electrical lecturer' commanding the batteries, the 'professor of chemistry' arranging the mortars, and the 'Daguerrotypist' taking off 'anybody in a minute'. Notes the 'spirit of philosophical liberality' shown at a banquet attended by the lecturers and spectators. Punch's scientific description of the event includes the observation that when the grog arrived there was a 'decrease in the volume and evolution of caloric upon mixing alcohol with water'. Among the toasts proposed at the dinner was one to the 'mental electrotype, which invests all it publishes with gold'.
Responds to news that a shoemaker was invited to 'uphold the credit of his trade' at the meeting of the British Association for the Advancement of ScienceBritish Association for the Advancement of Science
CloseView the register entry >>. The shoemaker has devoted his life to 'the human understanding by taking models of his customers' feet in gypsum' and he offers to apply the principles of EuclidEuclid
(fl. 295 BC)
DSB CloseView the register entry >> to the ordinary ankle-jack'. Believes he has done for the boot 'what NewtonNewton, Sir Isaac
(1642–1727)
DSB CloseView the register entry >> did for the Ribston pippin—investing the article in question with high scientific interest'.
Continues coverage of activities of this fictional institution (last reported on in Anon, 'Antiquarian Society: The Sniveyson Marbles', Punch, 4 (1843), 214). The spoof proceedings of the institution begin with a list of lectures to be delivered, including 'Brook Green' on the 'Impropriety of Pyrotechnics (addressed especially to the junior classes)' (146). Adds that the institution's 'Reading Room' has acquired several periodicals including the fictional 'Monthly Medical Gazette of ParrParr, Bartholomew
(1750–1810)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >>, CockleCockle, Mr
(fl. 1843)
PU1/5/15/1 CloseView the register entry >>, and MorrisonMorison, James
(1770–1840)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >>'.
Includes extracts from G Calvert Holland'sHolland, George Calvert
(1801–65)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >>Vital Statistics of SheffieldHolland, George
Calvert 1843. The Vital Statistics of Sheffield, London:
Robert Tyas
CloseView the register entry >>, a work describing the 'tragic history of the iron fork-grinder'. The author of the article reports that 'nearly one-third' of the fork-grinders examined suffered from an incurable lung disease caused by the inhalation of 'fine particles of stone and metal' produced in fork grinding. Punch believes these statistics might 'spoil a good man's dinner' and show that forks are 'Death's most handy weapon'.
Following James R G Graham'sGraham, Sir James Robert George, 2nd
Baronet
(1792–1861)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> savage remarks about the 'general run of heads of the CommonsHouse of Commons
CloseView the register entry >>', this reports that Graham has 'ordered a machine to be constructed, to be called, the Caputometer, with which all members of Parliament will be duly measured; and those who are found to have the least head among them will, for the proper working out of Sir Robert'sPeel, Sir Robert, 2nd Baronet
(1788–1850)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> measures, be immediately promoted to the ministry'.
Medical Practitioners, Medical Treatment, Education, Temperance, Commerce, Publishing, Textbooks
Offers 'young medical practitioners' advice on how to write a book that will make them 'notorious'. Responding to Theobald Mathew'sMathew, Theobald ('Father')
(1790–1856)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> attempts to ban liquor consumption, Punch suggests a treatise on the 'diseases of intemperance'. This 'Medicina Teetotalis' will describe the symptoms 'arising from the abrupt disuse of beer, wine and spirits' and will draw on experiments on the many patients who will 'pour in'. Describes, in the language of apothecaries, several formulas for mixtures that 'imitate' alcoholic beverages and which can be prescribed by the medical practitioner. The first mixture, for example, is composed of 'Compound Tincture of Cardamoms' and 'Crystal Spring' and will 'form a mixture resembling cold brandy and water'. (162) Believes that by devising 'many variations' on these formulas the medical practitioner will secure fame, fortune, and 'the girl of his heart' (163).
Punch, 5 (1843), 164.
Advice to Young Gentleman: On Taking Young Ladies About
Punch shows how 'young gentleman' can bluff their way in dealing with ladies' questions on botany and the steam engine. For example, having been asked 'what is the name of that lovely flower', the young man is advised to reply: 'Constantine Palaeologus. A decasyllabic plant; native of Polynesia. Class Alexandria; order, Viriginia'. Included in Punch's suggested explanation of a steam-engine is the sentence, 'That part of the machine which you can see moving up and down is the hypothesis, the tube which it moves in is termed the dilemma'.
A parody of the British Association for the Advancement of ScienceBritish Association for the Advancement of Science
CloseView the register entry >> proceedings, it opens with a report on a paper by Dr Spectrum on the 'Presence of Prismatic Colours in Potatoes'. This discusses the presentation of 'prismatic colours' to the eye and the appearance of purple rays on the skin around the eyelid when the author was hit in the eye by a potato. Attributes this effect to a rainbow imparting some of its colour to the potato plant. Reports that Mr C Sharpe told the association that the sudden cracking of glass in a pair of spectacles testifies to 'the tangibility and force in the impact of the visual ray'. Announces that Mr Alfred Bunn read 'the report of the Committee for the Reduction of Stars on a Method of Hypothetical Representation, as applied to Impossible Results, by Professor Muddlewitz'. The report is short and full of confusing mathematical and physical terms. The association's president explains the report in 'a more familiar way' and agrees that Muddlewitz's method only applies to 'impossible results'.
Mesmerism, Animal Magnetism, Medical Practitioners, Phrenology, Music
Believes traditional musical instruments must 'cede' to John Elliotson'sElliotson, John
(1791–1868)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> 'wonderful instrument'. Elliotson is reported to have touched the cerebral organs of a mesmerized young woman and accordingly compelled the woman to act in a manner corresponding to the nature of the organ touched. For example, when he moved his finger to 'benevolence' the woman became silent and 'amiable'. Elliotson believes he can 'play upon her head as upon a piano'. Punch agrees that the lady 'appears to be a sort of piccolo', but thinks the instrument is out of tune and criticises Elliotson for occasionally hitting 'the wrong key' and for mistaking the 'character of the tune he produces'. The illustration shows Elliotson standing over a seated mesmerized woman, his hands placed over her head as if he were playing a piano.
Punch, 5 (1843), 171.
Post Mortem Examination of a Sharp-Practice Lawyer
Medical Treatment, Physiognomy, Anatomy, Soul, Physiology
Punch recounts its examination of the cadaver of Mr Caveat Club, a recently deceased lawyer notorious for his 'pettifogging'. Describing the cadaver's exterior features, it notes that the body 'presented an intense expression of roguery' and resembled an animal. Having opened up the chest, Punch notes that the heart was in the 'wrong place', 'small', 'stony', and 'black'. Its description of the inside of the body also includes the observation that the 'pineal gland, which is said to be the seat of the soul, was altogether in a state of disease', and that the 'anterior lobes' showed signs of such base activities as 'quibbling', 'cavilling', and 'plotting'.
Notes that the moon will be eclipsed at the 'inauguration of the sheriff's dinner next year' and that 'Moon in perigee, going home therefrom'. The allusion is to the Sheriff of London and Middlesex, Francis G MoonMoon, Sir Francis Graham
(1796–1871)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >>.
The author believes his observations will clear up the problem of the spots that John F W HerschelHerschel, Sir John Frederick William
(1792–1871)
DSB
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> and James SouthSouth, James
(1785–1867)
DSB CloseView the register entry >> discovered on Jupiter. His diary records the increase of red spots on Jupiter's 'face' and ends with the conclusion that 'Jupiter has got the—Measles'.
Medical Treatment, Education, Instruments, Medical Practitioners
Questions at University College HospitalUniversity College Hospital Medical School
CloseView the register entry >> include the definition of 'Tic douloureux', the answer to which is 'borrowing ten shillings on a three guinea case of instruments over night, and loosing the duplicate in the morning'.
A spoof report on a meeting of the London Phrenological SocietyLondon Phrenological Society
CloseView the register entry >> where Mr MacCalliper discussed the cerebral organs of a 'tragedian', Mr Peter Wildrave. The lecturer notes the abnormally large size of the organs of 'Love of Approbation', 'Self-Esteem', 'Veneration', and 'Marvellousness'. Many other organs were abnormally small. The minuteness of 'Comparison' and 'Causality', for example, was linked to the fact that Wildrave 'never could perceive the reason why his performances did not draw'.
Reports various crude means of gauging the weather. For example, the 'Meteorological Register' of Mr Spiff of Hackney consists of the thermometer being at its 'height' on one day and lowest the day after, when it fell to the ground.
Believes botany and horticulture are eminently 'liberal' sciences. Adds that 'we mean by Botany, the knowledge—and by Horticulture, the cultivation—of plants and flowers, in subservience to utility and to the gratification of the sense of Beauty. It is, we apprehend, through their operation on this sense, that they ameliorate the mind'. Thinks the 'botanical researches' in the recently improved Kensington GardensKensington Gardens
CloseView the register entry >> 'tend to soften' the manners of visitors.
Describes the 'new and improved telescope' of a Mr FlitFlit, Mr
(fl. 1843)
PU1/5/20/2 CloseView the register entry >> of Regent Circus. Explains that the instrument allows the user to observe the moon 'equally well on cloudy nights, or when there was none at all, the case inclosing an ingenious transparency of that body, behind which a small oil lamp was hung'.
Reports on the dining rooms at the Royal Polytechnic InstitutionRoyal Polytechnic Institution
CloseView the register entry >>. Observes that the 'Professors of Chemistry and Experimental Philosophy will be appointed the chief cooks' and that the steam-engine in the Hall of Manufactures will 'cook the potatoes'. Reassures readers that the oxy-hydrogen microscope will be used to check for deposits in the drinking water, and that the diving bell will be used to see 'if it is possible to pickle trout alive'. Other innovations include the weighing of visitors on the patent dial machine (which will determine how much they pay), the preservation of fruit in the institution's air-pump, the conversion of grass and buttercups into milk and cream by Kreüzer's 'artificial gastric machine', and seats 'formed by Leyden jars, attached to Armstrong'sArmstrong, Sir William George, Baron
Armstrong of Cragside
(1810–1900)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >> Hydro-electric machine' for exciting the liver 'to its proper sense of duty'. The illustration shows a thin and a fat man being weighed on dial machines at the entrance and exit of the Royal Polytechnic Institution.
Societies, Chemistry, Mineralogy, Heat, Cultural Geography, Politics, Government
A parody of the activities of the British Association for the Advancement of ScienceBritish Association for the Advancement of Science
CloseView the register entry >>, this article announces that the president of the 'Chemistry and Mineralogy' Section is Dr Alkey Line and its vice-presidents are the 'Marquis of Coalhampton and Professor Copperas'. A Dr Murphy presents a paper 'On the Heat of Combination' which leads to the conclusion that 'if the salts called "justice for Ireland" be placed in combination with a diluted solution of "government", and elevation of temperature occurs during the decomposition of the former by the latter'. The observed consequences of this reaction include 'Repeal' which, in combination with 'Dannic acid, of the formula O'C' (an allusion to the radical Irish politician Daniel O'ConnellO'Connell, Daniel
(1775–1847)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >>) produces much heat. Reports on a paper by Mr Bang on the claim that the shadow of an American clerk remained fixed on a wall for weeks after his death. The claim is supported by 'recent discoveries in Thermography'.
The essay notes the recent revelation by the 'Solar Microscope' of the gruesome creatures inhabiting a single drop of London's water. Seeks to show how Theobald MathewMathew, Theobald ('Father')
(1790–1856)
ODNB CloseView the register entry >>, the prominent temperance campaigner, would show in his 'drop of water'. Believes the scene would contain 'bags of money [...] swimming about with fins', and a happy family at tea 'and all the volumes of Punch on the bookshelf'.
[2] The Gin Drop
Subjects:
Microscopy, Public Health, Temperance, Pollution
Depicts the infernal scene in a 'drop of gin' when magnified '3,000,000,000 times' by the 'Solar Microscope'. The scene includes such terrible images as the devil, monsters, a hanging, and a suicide. The 'abominations abounding' in the drop tell Punch how 'weak and poverty-striken' was the journal's imagination.
A parody of the activities of the British Association for the Advancement of ScienceBritish Association for the Advancement of Science
CloseView the register entry >>. Reveals that the 'Geology and Physical Geography Section' is presided over by Sir Grey Whackie and has vice-presidents, Professors Hämmer and Töngs. Reports on Mr Sappy's paper, 'proving the impossibility of being able to see into the middle of next week, from known facts with regard to the Equation of Time'. Sappy concludes from his paper that having sailed round the world, a 'sailor [...] finds himself to be "a man in advance of his age" by one day'. The 'Report of the Committee on Earthquakes in Ireland' describes fears that an 'irruption' would break out in 'Conquer Hill' near Dublin. Mr Cole Vane's paper 'On the Geology of Hearts' reveals, for example, that a lawyer's heart was 'of the trap formation', and that the heart of a habitual drunkard was 'changed entirely into quartz'.
Reports that Mr Solomon Levi exhibited some specimens of Cuba inodorifera and established that the plants are connected by a 'cell'. Reports the award of the 'Victoria medal' to a Mrs Tickall for her 'fine bunches of grapes', and Mr Figgin's exhibition of some 'Rhizanthaceous plants [...] developed by a peculiar process of pruning, from the roots of turnips'.
Written in Cockney, Sammins laments the slaying of the 'Hindian Hox or Bamin Bull' at Windsor. He is 'cut up [...] at sich a Waste of Nateral Histery' and believes the animal was 'a regler Phinumenon, with a Scientifficle Name and all, namely Zebu alias Boss Tauris Alias Hindicusm and a purdigus fine specimen of the Specious with a remarkable Ump, and altogether quite a Site for the admirers of Creation'. (230)
Compares the attraction between him and his beloved Mary to that between chemical elements and compounds. Likens his affinity for Mary to that between Potassium and Oxygen. Wishes that 'I, my Mary, were an acid, / A living acid; thou an alkali' / Endow'd with human sense, that brought together, / We might both coalesce into one salt'. Other chemical combinations to which he compares his relationship include sulphuric acid and soda (resulting in Glauber's salt) and potassa and aqua-fortis (resulting in saltpetre). Believes that 'We'd live and love together, until death / Should decompose the fleshly tertium quid, / Leaving our souls to all eternity / Amalgamated'.
Medical Practitioners, Medical Treatment, Accidents
Believes that the injuries caused to the eye by umbrella-points and walking sticks provides 'oculists' with great numbers of patients. Thinks it is a 'pity, that eyes should be absolutely destroyed' because merely a seriously injured eye would 'suffice for professional purposes'. Congratulates the surgical profession on the 'state of the metropolitan thoroughfares' because the latter present obstructions which 'give rise to an immense number of fractures and dislocations'.
Parody of the activities of the British Association for the Advancement of ScienceBritish Association for the Advancement of Science
CloseView the register entry >>. The president of the spoof association, Sir Guy Raffe, communicated a letter from Professor De Lenz on a 'skeleton of a male flea in the folds of a mummy-cloth'. The professor observed that the flea returned to life on exposure to the air, and bit him. Reports on a paper by Mr Slick of Slickville on the 'live oak', an American tree that grows so rapidly that it enabled the author's friend to quickly assemble a boat. The president argues that this tree is the same as that which allegedly 'grew from the horse of the Baron Munchausen', a sample of which the president possessed. Concludes with the report of the 'committee appointed to investigate whether female oysters have beards'.
A 'Professor' seeks an 'aged Lady, of a very nervous temperament', to mesmerize all the 'organs in her street'. The illustration depicts an organ-player.
Series of questions and answers on botany, in which the answers are puns on botanical terms. For example, the answer to the question, 'What are the most difficult roots to extract from the ground', is, 'the Cube root'.
Societies, Medical Practitioners, Medical Treatment, Physiology, Human Species
Parody of the activities of the British Association for the Advancement of ScienceBritish Association for the Advancement of Science
CloseView the register entry >>. Reports on Dr Nobbe's paper, 'On the Influence of Coronary Circulation on the Heart's Action', which explores the connection between hats worn on the head and the effect on the wearer's philanthropic feelings. Dr Grubb's paper, 'On a General Law of Vital Periodicity', observes that the 'entire population' is pervaded by a period of four hours—that which interposes between feelings of hunger.
A patient describes his symptoms to a physician who, on questioning and physically examining the patient, repeatedly insists that the patient's problem derives from bile. Whichever 'symptom' the patient describes, however mundane, the physician argues that bile is the cause. For example, the patient complains: 'I have an itching sensation occasionally at the end of the nose, and a burning of the tips of the ears, a soreness of the chest when I go to breath, a trembling at the knees, and a sensation of cold, like water poured down the back'. The physician simply replies: 'All owing to bile, Sir'. The physician proceeds to explain the biliary organs, prescribes pills, and advises on a suitable diet. The illustration shows a physician and his sorry-looking patient.
Continuing the parody of the activities of the British Association for the Advancement of ScienceBritish Association for the Advancement of Science
CloseView the register entry >>, the spoof statistical section's luminaries have names based on statistical practices: for example, the vice-presidents are Mr Littel Witte and Dr Addem. Reports on Mr Boy's paper on 'Contributions to Academical Statistics', which concerns itself with such recondite information as the 'average length of slate pencils' and the use of sponges to clean slates.
Reports on another scheme for 'guiding balloons through the air by means of whirligigs'. The scheme involves positioning the hands in front of the nose and then moving the hands up and down in a vertical plane. The illustration shows a cad attempting the scheme.