Genre:

Reportage, Spoof

Subjects:

Analytical Chemistry, Statistics, Physical Geography, Societies

    Reports that the 'learned gentlemen' of the Chemical Society analysed Thames water into 'Fleet Ditch', 'Spring water', 'Corks', 'Extractive and vegetable matter', and 'Residue, chiefly mud and broken glass'. Reports that the Statistical Society has been investigating the disappearance of umbrellas during bad weather. Calculates that the material composing the umbrellas could be used to make a roof over the Vauxhall Gardens and to build a balloon for landing a 'thousand troops in China in 24 hours'. Concludes with the Geographical Society which has been trying to find the 'beginning and end of Marylebone Lane' and why large ships on the Thames near Greenwich appear to be sailing in the fields and gardens behind the houses on the river banks.