Genre:

Essay, Spoof

Subjects:

Medical Treatment, Human Species, Quackery, Mental Illness, Crime

    Describes four patent medicines 'for the patronage of the British Public': 'Kalopoietic Sternutatory, or Beautifying Snuff'—a potion for removing warts and other unsightly features from the nose; 'Metamaphoseon, or Transforming Eye Water'— a potion for changing the colour of the eyes and for correcting poor vision; 'Figure Pills'—a medicine for removing bodily deformities and 'all unshapely extremities'; and the 'Moral and Intellectual Elixir'—an 'unfailing remedy for all MENTAL MALADIES from INSANITY and FATUITY to MANIA'. The latter potion is touted as a cure for criminality and ignorance and recommended to 'Metaphysicians, Philosophers, and all Persons engaged in the investigation of Truth'.