Genre:

Reportage, Spoof

Subjects:

Measurement, Mapping, Metrology, Domestic Economy

    Reports on the 'Great disputes that have arisen among engineers and scientific gentlemen as to the particular scale that should be adopted in taking the survey of a fashionable lady's dress'. Presents the arguments of Francis R Charteris (Lord Elcho) Charteris (formerly Charteris-Wemyss-Douglas), Francis Richard, 8th Earl of Wemyss and 3rd Baron Wemyss (formerly styled 'Lord Elcho') (1818–1914) Cokayne 1910–59
Close   View the register entry >> for the adoption of a scale of 'twenty-five inches to the mile', and his answers to the objection that the map of a dress on his scale would be enormous. Concludes with Roderick I Murchison's Murchison, Sir Roderick Impey, 1st Baronet (1792–1871) DSBODNB
Close   View the register entry >> argument that a one-inch scale map should be used because a larger-scale map would be 'useless and extravagant' and husbands only needed to have milliner's bills to 'estimate the quantity' of material.

Genre:

Essay, Drollery

Subjects:

Animal Behaviour, Ornithology, Human Development, Analogy, Health, Domestic Economy

    Explains that while 'Useful lessons' can be learned from 'inferior creatures', the cuckoo sets a poor example of child-rearing, which is copied by 'ladies who put their children out to wet-nurse'. Discusses a 'monthly paper' presented to the London Society for the Protection of Young Females London Society for the Protection of Young Females
Close   View the register entry >> which attacks wet-nursing as a great 'social evil'. Assesses the advantages and disadvantages of hiring mothers who have lost their babies while working as wet-nurses, noting that such wet-nurses starve infants as 'the young hedge-sparrow is thrown over'. Thinks ladies should nurse their own babies in case wet-nurses, like cuckoos, administer nutriments to infants which may contain 'immoral and morbid peculiarities'.

Genre:

Notes, Drollery

Subjects:

Health, Medical Practitioners, Medical Treatment, Pharmaceuticals, Quackery

    Methods for achieving this goal include having 'half a dozen doctors', drinking 'all the medicine [doctors] send you', trying 'every new quack', and, 'if that doesn't kill you, quack[ing] yourself'.

Genre:

Reportage, Spoof

Subjects:

Astronomy, Superstition

    Claims that the 'Coming Comet' has 'gone in search of the Coming Man', who will ride the comet to Earth amidst a 'blaze of triumph' that will 'amply atone' for any disappointment caused by such phenomena.

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Medical Practitioners, Medical Treatment, Government, Politics, Professionalization

Institutions mentioned:

Royal College of Physicians Royal College of Physicians
Close   View the register entry >>

    Reports on the fear entertained by 'the several medical corporations' that although Thomas E Headlam's Headlam, Thomas Emerson (1813–75) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> medical bill has passed its second reading it will not get through the committee stage. Explains that the withdrawn rival medical bill of Francis R Charteris (Lord Elcho) Charteris (formerly Charteris-Wemyss-Douglas), Francis Richard, 8th Earl of Wemyss and 3rd Baron Wemyss (formerly styled 'Lord Elcho') (1818–1914) Cokayne 1910–59
Close   View the register entry >> would have 'vested the construction of the medical educational body' in the government, which Punch regards as 'no competent judge of scientific merit'. Notes that Headlam's bill preserves the right of medical corporations to demand 'handsome fees' from medical students before they can practise, and thus 'narrows the entrance' into the medical profession and shuts out enterprising competitors. Accordingly, Punch emphasises that 'established practitioners' will benefit from the bill which will exclude 'poor clever fellows' who 'might prove dangerous rivals to thriving medical men'. Argues that if Headlam had contemplated the 'good of the community' in his bill, he might have based his legislation on the 'principles of Free Trade', in which everybody 'would be at liberty to be quacked' or to be seen by a 'legally qualified practitioner'. Adds that this legislation will punish unqualified practitioners, make the examining of candidates and the granting of diplomas the sole right of existing corporations, and establish a new medical examining board.

Genre:

Illustration, Satire

Relevant illustrations:

wdct.

Subjects:

Railways, Invention, Commerce

    Shows a railway company director enjoying a smoke whilst sitting on a chair attached to the front of a steam locomotive.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Health, Physics, Electricity, Disability, Mental Illness

    Following 'PROFESSOR KNOTZ'S Knotz, Prof. (fl. 1858) PU1/33/3/2
Close   View the register entry >>' claim that 'whatever conducts the electricity of the body from it will occasion direct debility', anticipates the dangers of wearing steel hoops, which debilitate the body and the mind of the wearer.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Vaccination, Death, Commerce

    Suggests that the petition against a vaccination bill in the House of Commons House of Commons
Close   View the register entry >> has been presented by undertakers.

Genre:

Letter, Spoof

Subjects:

Invention, Engineers, Patronage

People mentioned:

Henry Cort Cort, Henry (1741?–1800) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >>

    Criticises the fact that the sum of pensions charged to the Civil List amounts to £1,200, while some £4,625 is spent on 'flunkeyism'.

Genre:

Serial, Essay, Drollery

Subjects:

Pollution, Health, Public Health, Gas Chemistry

    Laments the overcrowding and foul air of 'drawing-room penitentiaries'—the London clubs. Continuing the analogy between prisons and clubs, explains how a visitor to the 'wards' of this prison breathes the 'vitiated atmospheres of these black holes of Piccadilly'. Observes that the effect of this poor atmosphere is seen 'in the pale cheeks and dull eyes of the hardened offenders, who spend most of their lives in such confinement'. Notes the overheated condition of the rooms 'for every cluster of lights, every flower-stand, every overheated piece of humanity, is giving off caloric and carbonic acid, and absorbing breathable air'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Electricity, Manufactories, Amusement

    Suggests that a fairy in a stage performance of 'Fairy-Land' looked 'as though she had been electrotyped [...] at ELKINGTON'S Elkington, George Richards (1801–65) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> shop'.

Genre:

Song

Subjects:

Medical Practitioners, Pharmaceuticals, Medical Treatment, Commerce

    Aimed at 'Medical Bill Framers', this song describes a chemist's 'over the counter' trade in drugs. Observes that while legislators would stop him from answering 'an old woman, "What's good for the bile?"', he intends to defy prohibition and sell her a remedy. Proceeds to explain how he gives 'physick' to patients (including Mrs Harris and Mrs Gamp) and asks how a medical bill can stop him dispensing various remedies 'Whilst I'm free / Still to ply pestle and mortar'.

Genre:

Letter, Spoof

Subjects:

Hospitals, Astronomy, Language

    The boy tells Mr Punch about his 'governor', who surmised that the word 'orbas', to be used in an inscription on a hospital for orphans of soldiers, meant that the hospital was intended for 'sick worlds'—'Perhaps the worlds the Comet has hit'.

Genre:

Notes, Drollery

Subjects:

Horticulture, Disease, Pharmaceuticals, Religious Authority

Genre:

Reportage, Drollery

Subjects:

Telegraphy, Technology, Government

    Claims that on seeing the many miles of iron-wire cable at the office of the Atlantic Telegraph Company Atlantic Telegraph Company
Close   View the register entry >>, the railway commissioner Frederick Peel Peel, Sir Frederick (1823–1906) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> wished the cable had been 'Red Tape'.

Genre:

Poetry

Subjects:

Military Technology, War

    Opens by noting that 'With superstitious fury fired / By provocation slight, / Our Sepoys mutiny—required / Greased cartridges to bite'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Public Health, Sanitation, Pollution, Disease, Language, Taxonomy

    Responding to Charles J B Aldis's Aldis, Charles James Berridge (1808–72) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> article in The Times The Times (1777–1900+) Waterloo Directory
Close   View the register entry >>, complaining about sewer stench in Lupus Street, Pimlico, notes that 'Lupus is not only Latin for wolf, but is also a nosological term for an affection of the olfactory organ'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Politics, Government, Cruelty, Animal Behaviour, Crime, Zoological Gardens, Government

    Responds to news of the bill for the prevention of cruelty to animals promoted by John V S Townshend (Viscount Raynham) Townshend, John Villiers Stuart, 5th Marquess Townshend (formerly styled 'Viscount Raynham') (1831–1925) Cokayne 1910-59
Close   View the register entry >>, a measure so rigorous that 'you would not have been able to have had a lobster for supper' and which would have made it unsafe 'for any man to open an oyster'. Notes the devastating effect that the bill, which legislates against confinement of animals, would have on the Zoological Society Gardens Zoological Society of London —Gardens
Close   View the register entry >> and its secretary, David W Mitchell Mitchell, David William (1813–59) WBI
Close   View the register entry >>. Observes that the bill has as much chance of passing as 'the Master of the Mint passing a bad shilling' and believes Raynham's 'absurd attempt at legislation' is the result of 'the wildest outbreak of animal spirits'.

Genre:

Illustration, Drollery

Relevant illustrations:

wdct.

Subjects:

Heat, Invention, Technology

    Shows a man wearing a cylindrical object around his torso. The object is labelled 'COOL AS ICE' / 'UNDER A BLAZING SUN', and its wearer explains to another man that it is a 'PORTABLE REFRIGERATOR'.

Genre:

Essay, Drollery

Subjects:

Scientific Practitioners, Heroism

People mentioned:

Arthur Wellesley (1st Duke of Wellington) Wellesley, Arthur, 1st Duke of Wellington (1769–1852) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >>

    Argues that 'The highest honour that we pay to our most illustrious personages is that of applying their names to boots' but that while there is 'the NEWTONIAN theory and the DAVY lamp [...] there are no NEWTONS at 14s. 6d. or DAVYS at 12s'—a reference to possible boots named after Isaac Newton Newton, Sir Isaac (1642–1727) DSB
Close   View the register entry >> and Humphry Davy Davy, Sir Humphry, Baronet (1778–1829) DSB ODNB
Close   View the register entry >>.

Genre:

Poetry

Subjects:

Medical Treatment, Surgery

    Describes the attempt by a surgeon to treat the 'blinding stye' on the 'lustrous eyne' of his mistress.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Nutrition, Hunting, Amusement

    Suggests that the winner of the Goodwood Cup horse race will not 'go to the hounds' because it will be consumed by Isidore Geoffroy Saint-Hilaire Geoffroy Saint-Hilaire, Isidore (1805–61) DSB
Close   View the register entry >> and his fellow 'hippophagists'.

Genre:

Notes, Drollery

Subjects:

Medical Practitioners, Scientific Practitioners, Pharmaceuticals, Charlatanry, Medical Treatment

    This list of corrupt practices which need to be curbed with legislation include 'medical men having themselves called out of church' and 'chemists assuming the functions of medical men by giving "advice gratis" to patients who come to buy their drugs'.

Genre:

Reportage, Spoof

Subjects:

Education, Chemistry, Government

    Reports that a 'Wag of the Board of Examiners at the Apothecaries' Hall Worshipful Society of Apothecaries of London—Apothecaries' Hall
Close   View the register entry >>' gave the answer to the examination question 'What Government measure was like muriatic [hydrochloric] acid', as 'the Divorce Bill [...] because it will dissolve the wedding ring'.

Genre:

Letter, Spoof

Subjects:

Education, Geology, Heat, Physics

People mentioned:

Euclid, Euclid (fl. 295 BC) DSB
Close   View the register entry >> Michael Faraday Faraday, Michael (1791–1867) DSB
Close   View the register entry >>

Institutions mentioned:

Army Army
Close   View the register entry >>

    Noting the awesome range of subjects that the Council of Military Education Army—Council of Military Education
Close   View the register entry >> expects army officers to master, the narrator, a spoof applicant to the army, doubts whether leading men of the day have mastered these subjects. For example, he wonders, 'What does SIR CHARLES NAPIER Napier, Sir Charles (1786–1860) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> [...] know about geology[?]', and whether 'MR ROEBUCK Roebuck, John Arthur (1802–79) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> has any extensive knowledge of the mysteries of heat, beyond the heat of temper he occasionally displays in debate'.

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Anatomy, Crime, Human Development

    Comments on an article in a Dublin newspaper reporting the discovery of a decapitated human body 'in an extraordinary state of preservation'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Animal Behaviour, Crime, Government

    Draws attention to ambiguities in the wording of the bill for the prevention of cruelty to animals sponsored by John V S Townshend (Viscount Raynham) Townshend, John Villiers Stuart, 5th Marquess Townshend (formerly styled 'Viscount Raynham') (1831–1925) Cokayne 1910-59
Close   View the register entry >>, and suggests that 'the frequent proofs of asininity in the verdicts of our juries should entitle them in justice to be treated as humanely at the least as other members of the long-eared race'. Accordingly, it proposes to make it illegal to 'starve a conscientious jury who "won't go" to a decision' on the analogy with the law against injuring a donkey 'what wouldn't go'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Education, Medical Practitioners, Surgery

Institutions mentioned:

Royal College of Surgeons Royal College of Surgeons
Close   View the register entry >>

    Compares the complicated anatomy of parts of the human body with the apparently more incomprehensible 'anatomy of a complex fashionable costume'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Animal Behaviour, Monstrosities, Time, Natural History, Nationalism

    Responding to newspaper discussion of the ages of various animals, criticises the 'unpardonable' omission of the British lion from the debate. Considers the latter species to be older than the elephant, a species which, as Punch notes, was estimated by George L Leclerc, comte de Buffon Buffon, Georges-Louis Leclerc, comte de (1707–88) DSB
Close   View the register entry >>, to be 500 years old. Suggests methods of ascertaining the lion's age and (referring to the newspaper discussion) deplores the omission of other fabulous creatures, including the Russian bear, the French eagle, and the American sea serpent.

Genre:

Reportage, Spoof

Subjects:

Medical Practitioners, Crime, Charlatanry, Museums, Anatomy

    Following the publication of details of a criminal trial in the Lancet Lancet (1823–1900+) Waterloo Directory
Close   View the register entry >>, claims that Joseph Kahn Kahn, Joseph (fl. 1857) Altick 1978
Close   View the register entry >> 'has felt himself such a negative in the medical profession' that he has decided to change the name of his 'Exhibition' from 'KAHN'S MUSEUM Kahn's (Dr) Museum [of anatomy], Leicester Square
Close   View the register entry >>' to 'THE MUSEUM OF CAN'T' in order to 'suit his position'.

Genre:

Poetry, Drollery

Subjects:

Telegraphy, Class, Superstition, Religious Authority, Providence, Technology, Accidents

Institutions mentioned:

Atlantic Telegraph Company Atlantic Telegraph Company
Close   View the register entry >>

    Written in the style of a country yokel, this is the author's attempt to come to terms with the 'wonders' of 'This here Zub-Atlantic Cable'. He asks his friend Bill 'how fur you makes ut / This here Cable vor to lay? / At a moderate calcilation ? 'Tween two thousand miles and dree, / Bringun in communication / Ireland and Amerikey'. Notes that the cable 'Is described, by them who've sin, / Gutter percher, outer portion, / Over 'lectric wires within', and 'sees a token / In that precious link, of peace [...] 'tween brothers, / Who aloan is Vreedom's hope'. He recognises that the cable will not be buffeted 'When the storms above 'un sweep' and that when the cable 'draps down in the hollers' of the deep, it will be supported on 'What they calls a reef ixtends'. Concludes by drinking a toast to 'Lantic Telegraph's success'. The editor, however, regrets that 'our bucolic' contributor had not read news reports confirming his worry that 'Wun't it [the cable] snap?'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Telegraphy, Technology, Accidents, Commerce, Race

Institutions mentioned:

Atlantic Telegraph Company Atlantic Telegraph Company
Close   View the register entry >>

    Reports that a friend of Punch with 'very strong prejudices against the Irish' holds that the Atlantic telegraph cable failed because it started in Ireland where, 'with the system of "paying out"', it is hard to 'make both ends meet'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Telegraphy, Technology, Accidents

Institutions mentioned:

Atlantic Telegraph Company Atlantic Telegraph Company
Close   View the register entry >>

    Reports that an 'acquaintance' of Punch claims that the names of the ships in the Atlantic telegraph squadron 'presaged failure': 'the Cyclops HMS Cyclops
Close   View the register entry >> hinted that the directors were half blind, the Agamemnon HMS Agamemnon
Close   View the register entry >> that they had estimated by Troy weight, instead of taking care avoir due Poise, and the Niagara USS Niagara
Close   View the register entry >> that there would be a Great Fall'.

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Medical Practitioners, Medical Treatment, Hospitals, Language

    Responds to a newspaper article reporting the Lancet's Lancet (1823–1900+) Waterloo Directory
Close   View the register entry >> story of Dr O'Connor O'Connor, Dr (fl. 1857) PU1/33/9/3
Close   View the register entry >> of the Royal Free Hospital Royal Free Hospital
Close   View the register entry >> who achieved success with his 'new remedy for neuralgia' tried on patients 'suffering under his care'. Puzzled by this latter claim which undermines the credibility of the hospital. Lamenting the poor grammar that has caused this confusion, suggests that the hospital's 'lame sentences' be cured and managed by a 'Committee'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Medical Practitioners, Medical Treatment, Government

Institutions mentioned:

Parliament Houses of Parliament
Close   View the register entry >>

    Responding to news that William F Cowper Cowper, William Francis, 1st Baron Mount-Temple (1811–88) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> is to prepare a medical bill for the next parliamentary session, thinks this difficult task 'merits the appellation of Cowper's Task'—a reference to the celebrated poem of the eighteenth century poet, William Cowper Cowper, William (1731–1800) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >>.

Genre:

Notes, Drollery

Subjects:

Telegraphy, Accidents

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Telegraphy, Technology, Accidents, War, Race

Institutions mentioned:

Atlantic Telegraph Company Atlantic Telegraph Company
Close   View the register entry >>

    Following news that the unlaid portion of the 'Atlantic Rope' [cable] is to be laid to India, observes that the rope needed in India is one to 'Hang the Butcher'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Homeopathy, Medical Treatment, Patronage

    Reports on the elevation to the peerage of the 'amiable homeopathist', Robert Grosvenor (1st Baron Ebury) Grosvenor, Lord Robert, 1st Baron Ebury (1801–93) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >>, who apparently 'stipulated that the Boluses which are stuck on the spikes of an Earl's coronet, should be reduced to Globules'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Invention, Music, Medical Practitioners, Quackery, Language

    Reports on the invention of the 'Trito-Dactylo-Gymnast' which strengthens the third finger of a hand and thus improves a pianist's performance. Speculates on how the composer Felix Mendelssohn Mendelssohn, Felix (properly Mendelssohn-Bartholdy) (1809–47) CBD
Close   View the register entry >> would have benefited from such an invention, but warns that the device is supported by a dubious medical witness and that the complex name recalls the thespian John P Harley's Harley, John Pritt (1786–1858) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> quip 'the more Greek the more Quack'.

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Hunting, Ornithology, Cruelty, Amusement, Extinction, Class

    Discusses the views of two women 'of Mr. Punch's acquaintance' who have written to him lamenting the shooting and disappearance of seabirds from Flamborough Head. Notes Mr Punch's acquaintance's proposal to ban shooting these birds. Protests at 'how women believe in legislation', but distinguishes the gentlemanly sport of shooting game from gull-shooting, which consists of disreputable snobs killing, 'for killing's sake', one of the coast's 'most lovely and graceful living things'. Reports that Mr Punch too 'protests against this cruel and useless slaughter of these bright and harmless winged things', and hopes 'the darlings in mushroom hats make a point of rating every snob they see at the work', and that 'every true sportsman' will denounce this 'odious and cruel abuse of the gun'.

Genre:

Reportage, Drollery

Subjects:

Human Species, Heat, Race, Class, Physiology

    Discusses the 'wonderful' fact that a 'Negro, who went to bathe in the sea' off the Yorkshire coast, 'was discovered, upon emerging to have changed colour from a deep black to a beautiful bright red'. Adds that the phenomenon was caused by the heat of the water and resulted in the man losing his position as a footman, but then being taken up by a doctor who experimented on his skin.

Genre:

Reportage, Drollery

Subjects:

Medical Treatment, Commerce

    Reports on the case of a doctor whose patients mistook his coin-sized lozenges for real sovereigns.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Botanical Gardens

    Reports on the 'Great Water Lily' at the Royal Botanical Gardens, Kew, Royal Botanical Gardens, Kew
Close   View the register entry >> and the witty riposte of Queen Victoria's Victoria, Queen of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland, and Empress of India (1819–1901) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> physician Charles Locock Locock, Sir Charles (1799–1875) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >>, when asked to account for its Latin name, Victoria regia, that it was named 'out of compliment to MRS. LILLIE'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Engineering, Education, Cultural Geography, Language

    Discusses an advertisement in the Scotsman Scotsman (1817–1900+) BUCOP
Close   View the register entry >> for somebody to 'hammer into a Middle-Aged Man as much FRENCH as would carry him through Railways and Hotels in France'. Claims that 'a NASMYTH's Nasmyth, James (1808–90) DSB
Close   View the register entry >> patent hammer [...] equal to some thousands of blacksmiths' would be needed to hammer ideas into 'hardheaded' Scots.

Genre:

Diary, Drollery

Subjects:

Medical Treatment

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Pharmaceuticals, Medical Treatment, Narcotics, Crime

    Discusses the terms of employment that a 'Chemist and Druggist' made for a position of an assistant. Argues that should an unskilled assistant be hired and subsequently poison a customer, then a coroner's jury should return a verdict of 'manslaughter against the chemist and druggist' for his choice of assistant.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Medical Practitioners, Heroism, Vaccination

    Suggests that the pedestal for the statue of Edward Jenner Jenner, Edward (1749–1823) DSB
Close   View the register entry >> should show the 'great discoverer of Vaccination' placed 'on the point of a lancet arch'—a representation 'which will give JENNER a very much funnier position than that of the DUKE [of Wellington] Wellesley, Arthur, 1st Duke of Wellington (1769–1852) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> by St George's Hospital St George's Hospital
Close   View the register entry >>'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Telegraphy, Accidents, Cultural Geography

Institutions mentioned:

Atlantic Telegraph Company Atlantic Telegraph Company
Close   View the register entry >>

    Hopes the 'rupture of the Electric Cable' is the only rupture between England and America.

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Medical Practitioners, Disease, Vaccination, Heroism

    Reports on a young lady who refused to contribute towards the statue of Edward Jenner Jenner, Edward (1749–1823) DSB
Close   View the register entry >> on the grounds that her clear complexion was testimony enough to the power of 'Jenner's discovery'. Accordingly, Punch suggests that 'every handsome lady' who has been saved from the ravages of smallpox should 'take her turn in standing for one hour only of her lifetime' on a pedestal in Trafalgar Square (the proposed site of the Jenner statue).

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Relevant illustrations:

wdct.

Subjects:

Hunting, Amusement, Botany, Geology, Palaeontology

    Discusses Richard M Milnes's Milnes, Richard Monckton, 1st Baron Houghton (1809–85) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> proposal to replace field sports with 'geological and botanical pursuits', since they do not involve 'staining the fair carpet of nature with the blood of her children'. Accordingly, presents Mr Punch's suggestion for a newspaper report on the somewhat competitive activities of a 'Party of Gentleman-botanists' and of statesmen pursuing geological interests. The report emphasises the quantity and variety of botanical and geological specimens caught by the gentlemen, and their occasional 'rather wild' theories. The illustration shows two gentlemen in pursuit of botanical specimens.

Genre:

Illustration, Drollery; Poetry

Relevant illustrations:

wdct.

Subjects:

Steam-power, Electricity, Physics, Force, Progress, Morality, Crime, Telegraphy

    Describes a dialogue between 'Steam' and 'Electricity' concerning their benefits to the 'human race' and promotion of 'mankind's felicity'. Both 'Forces' ponder the ambiguities of their legacies. Electricity boasts of the speed with which 'tidings' from 'far lands' speed 'Through a wire, with a thought's velocity', but also observes that the world 'doesn't get on much better'. Steam ponders the fact that he has enabled men to cross 'land and sea [...] At the rate of a bird', but also increased the speed with which they 'kill and bleed'. Responding to Steam's claim that 'we help morality', Electricity agrees that 'Through us have been caught, and to justice brought, / Many scoundrels', and, referring to the Indian Mutiny, Steam hopes they will be able to revenge the crime of the 'Sepoy savages' by strangling them. They conclude in unison, claiming that they have failed in their promise to regenerate the nations because, while 'Locomotive powers alone are ours', they 'can't cause people to change their courses'. The illustration shows two Ancient Roman warriors: the first figure has a telegraph apparatus for its head, holds a telegraph pole, and is wrapped in wire, while the second figure has a railway locomotive for its head.

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Statistics, Politics, Charlatanry, Government

    Attacks 'an absurd "test" [...] of the efficiency of members of Parliament' which involves counting the number of times each visits the lobby of the Houses of Parliament Houses of Parliament
Close   View the register entry >>. Ridiculing the 'statistics' of 'prigs and shallow fellows' as 'little sums', draws attention to shortcomings of such mathematical methods, not least the ways in which a lazy politician can give the appearance of being attentive. Goes on to criticise the misleading nature of other analyses of politicians' behaviour published by '"statistic"-mongers'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Language, Zoology, Commerce

    Suggests 'a lawyer ought to figure in the human menagerie as the Ornithorynchus, or beast with a bill'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Invention, Technology, Steamships, Steam-power, Patronage, Cultural Geography

People mentioned:

Mr Prideaux Prideaux, Mr (fl. 1857) PU1/33/14/1
Close   View the register entry >>

    Wryly complains that Emperor Napoleon III Napoleon III, Emperor of France (originally Louis Napoléon (Charles Louis Napoléon Bonaparte)) (1808–73) CBD
Close   View the register entry >> of France insulted English 'authorities' by 'offering some violent contrast to their proceedings' of dealing with inventors. Claims that the emperor, whilst in Chalons, did not adhere to the customs of the local English officers and failed to prevent a French officer developing a 'Flute-screw'—'a great improvement in the screw for propelling steamers'. Instead, the emperor 'acts in a diametrically opposite fashion' and immediately requests that the invention be applied to ships in the French navy and for the inventor to be rewarded 'if successful'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Societies

Institutions mentioned:

British Association for the Advancement of Science British Association for the Advancement of Science
Close   View the register entry >>

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Quackery, Commerce, Charlatanry, Medical Treatment, Professionalization, Crime

    Rejoices to hear that quacks who advertise are annoyed at Punch's remarks on the 'equipages' which they 'drive about Town', which 'express their infamy' and their ability to sustain public ridicule as long as they can 'chuckle and rub their hands over the fees which they take at their own snug dens'. Notes that what annoys these quacks 'is that denotation of their class which causes every individual of it to be recognised, for the rascal he is, without affording him occasion for that revenge which he might, if his name were published, hope to take'. Observes that while some quacks have tried to advertise in ways that 'place them beyond the provisions' of the bill of John Campbell (1st Baron Campbell) Campbell, John, 1st Baron Campbell (1779–1861) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >>, 'anybody who advertises a peculiar cure of any disease or complaint [...] is either not a member of the Medical Profession, or is regarded by that profession as a disgrace to it'. Warns that those who consult quacks will be physically and financially weakened and will have to suffer a publicly humiliating and expensive legal trial.

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Animal Behaviour, Hunting, Pollution

    Describes the hunt by some sportsmen of some 'peculiarly offensive' rats in Holywell Street, London, which are 'especially mischievous to the young', which 'poison' the area in which they live, and which are 'very wily, and used only to be seen at night'.

Genre:

News-Commentary

Subjects:

Medical Practitioners, Medical Treatment, Charlatanry, Aesthetics, Commerce

    Criticises an advertisement in a Scarborough newspaper for 'PERSONAL BEAUTY, by a SURGEON', noting the suspiciously low cost for such promised cosmetic results. Laments the 'fools who put faith in such advertisements' and pities the fact that the advertiser did not 'endorse the lies with the authority of his name'. Doubts the efficacy of the proposed 'purl' as a draught for making the teeth whiter and thinks the surgeon must be 'a faultless Adonis' if he tries the remedies on himself. Wonders 'how this Admirable Crichton of a "Surgeon" can walk the streets, without being torn by the admiring ladies into a thousand little bits'.

Genre:

Poetry

Subjects:

Religious Authority, Progress, Cosmology, Astronomy, Railways, Steam-power, Telegraphy, Nationalism

    Written from the perspective of a Roman Catholic, the poet ponders the time when 'England's power and greatness shall to nothingness be brought' and when the 'pious night return, / Which to illuminate we should our holy tapers burn!'. Expresses nostalgia for the day when 'all that any one was taught proceeded from our lips', and asks, 'Why should not modern science—that to witchcraft is akin— / Decline and die like classic lore, alike the birth of sin?'. Anticipates that this will result in the revival of the ancient belief in a geocentric cosmos and in heaven being 'above the vault of blue, 'o'erhanging wide, / With none but those who worship thee upon the other side'. Notes that 'No longer, then, iron horse will fly with wings of steam, / Presumption's lightning wire will then have vanished like a dream; / True miracles will succeed'. Concludes by lamenting that these events will never 'come to pass while England's hale and strong'.

Genre:

Short Fiction, Spoof

Subjects:

Railways, Engineering, Commerce, Accidents, Charlatanry

    Narrates the story of 'The Blazer', an old locomotive which had been 'a first-rate piece of engine building in her day' and which George Stephenson Stephenson, George (1781–1848) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> had praised and christened. After years of 'honest, regular, steady work' on the Stockton and Darlington Railway Stockton and Darlington Railway
Close   View the register entry >>, the locomotive's boiler was 'all sound' and 'she' continued to work 'till railways had grown, and stretched their iron arms over the whole island'. However, the locomotive's fortunes declined when, on being transferred to 'one of the dashing, new Midland lines, got up on the Hudson Hudson, George (1800–71) ODNB
Close   View the register entry >> high-pressure system of, "a short life and a merry one"', it was overworked and like railway staff and officials, its health was 'risked recklessly for the purpose of swelling dividends'. Shortly afterwards, damage to the locomotive's boiler necessitated an overhaul of the engine, but the railway directors made the fatal decision of using the train to 'race the express of a rival line'. The results were catastrophic, with the engine's boiler breaking, railway carriages being 'jammed up into the air', and 'scores of people' being killed. Reflects on the guilty party in this disaster, defending the 'poor old Blazer', but blaming the engineer, the 'superintendent of the rolling stock', and the directors (who blamed the locomotive).

    The story ends with an account of a 'similar catastrophe' befalling 'another Company—on a much larger scale', which is a thinly veiled account of events during the Indian Mutiny. Relates that an 'old locomotive, called the GENERAL LLOYD Lloyd, George William Aylmer (1789–1865) WBI
Close   View the register entry >>, part of the stock of the East India Company East India Company
Close   View the register entry >>, has lately broken down near the Dinapore Station' causing an 'awful smash', as a result of which the 'Directors talk of trying the poor, old locomotive—which it was their duty to have had overhauled every journey'.

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Medical Treatment, Pharmaceuticals, Commerce

    Ridicules 'some advertising grocers of Leicester' for touting cures for toothache and the cough that work within one minute.

Genre:

Notes, Drollery

Subjects:

Photography

Genre:

News-Commentary, Drollery

Subjects:

Physics, Pneumatics, Chemistry, Gas Chemistry, Natural Law, Mechanics, Heat, Accidents

    Discusses a Manchester Examiner Manchester Examiner (1846–94) Waterloo Directory
Close   View the register entry >&